adventures in ci home edition

conversation between me and my stomach this afternoon.

s: i hate you.
j: but why?
s: it's nothing personal, I just do.
j: (nauseous moan)...but I've been doing the BRAT diet -(banana, rice, applesauce, toast...)
s: BRAT DIET my asss(cids). No one should eat as much ice cream as you have.
j: But that was years ago...
s: (Greasy fried) chicken's coming home to roost.
j: Uhnnnnn.
s: Trying to suck me in...don't think that Tums will help you now, beotch.
j: Blah.
s: Was it the asperatime of this afternoon's Coke Zero? Or the recent incursion into
yogurt? did you think I wouldn't notice? When I said "no diary" I meant 'NO DAIRY."
J: UGGGGHHHH.
s: Or it could just be out of whack immune system K cells having a little disco time down
here. You'll never know.
j: I will Sierra Mist you. Don't think I won't.
s: And don't think I won't send that shit back to where it came from! And did you really
think you'd get away with those organic cherry tomatoes??
j: But there were so fresh and so cute. And it was the farmer's market.
s: "organic's" just another word for "nothing left to lose" ...or "questionably fertilized."
j: You are so unforgiving lately. Like the last 5 years.
s: Not my fault you ate enough Whoppers to support an entire Burger King franchise.
j: But that was 10 years ago!
s: I remember EVERYTHING.

fin